Homosexual male escorts were the best companions I had last Christmas. As another Christmas comes, I have decided to share my experience to give strength to those who might be in a similar situation. My name is Stephen, but many of my close friends call me ST. And yes, I am gay. So, I bet it is easy for you to guess why I am talking about homosexual male escorts.
I am the third in the family of four. Two girls, two boys. Like my elder brother my parents where expectant that I would get married. However, growing up I discovered that I was more attracted to guys than girls. I used to have erections whenever I was with my male friends in the shower or when we went for swimming.
It was not the same when I look at girls. It was more of disgust. I remember a day when I went to the beach with my friends. I didn’t realize that some nudists used to visit the beach. It was a great day. I was enjoying the volleyball until my eyes flickered to the seashore and fell on this young lady emerging from the waves. She was totally unclad.
She didn’t seem to mind that many people (men and women) were staring at her. She flung her hair like a goddess spraying water bubbles in all direction. Her nipples poked out of her chest. The usual reaction was for me to get aroused.
We were six playing the volleyball, three on either side. When they all turned to the direction I was staring, I heard some of them gasp with excitement. “What the f*ck!” and “Damn!” were some of the exclamations I heard. The game was temporarily suspended while they satisfied their lustful eyes and thoughts.
I excused myself to a desolate location and began to puke. It was an unusual feeling even for myself. I have had other such discomforting feeling. I consciously decided that I would not allow myself to go through such torture. Becoming gay was a conscious decision to save me embarrassing moments and nerve cracking feelings.
When I told my parents that I was gay, they kicked against it. Tempers continued to flare in the house. I would attempt an innocent discussion with my parents and the next minute we were shouting at the top of our voices. All these happened because my parents were strong conservative Catholics. They were rigid about their Catholic believes, and to them, my attitude was polishing my CV as a candidate for hell.
For peace to reign, I moved out of the house to stay with one of my childhood friends. I did a lot of small jobs to keep moving. Even though leaving home created a vacuum within me, I was glad that I had peace.
It had become a family tradition for all of us to visit a park and spend time together. My elder brother and sister had been married 3 years prior, but they always visit every Christmas to spend the holiday. It was always a big family, and the feeling was always inexplicable.
As Christmas drew nearer, the hollowness in me increased. I longed to be with my family, but I knew my presence would have ruined everything. What complicated my woes was when my friend, the one I was staying with travelled to spend time with his family. I was left alone in the house. I have never witnessed that kind of depression that hit me before.
On Christmas Eve, I decided to take a little walk. I ended in the bar and took a few shots of tequila. It was there that I overhead some homosexual male escorts talking about Thanksgiving. Without having any other place in mind, I asked if I could join them and they obliged that I could have a place in their presence. It was thrilling.
I joined the homosexual male escorts in their Thanksgiving on Christmas day. Listening to them share their stories was strengthening. One of the homosexual male escorts even had a story that was similar to mine. Since that encounter, I have been contemplating joining homosexual male escorts in the profession rather than just admiring from the sideline.