Thinking of becoming a male escort? Worried it might not be safe? Male escorting can be a great profession but it does come with its risks. Before starting out, it’s important to know what those risks are and how to avoid them.
Is Being a Male Escort Dangerous?
Many jobs come with occupational hazards and being a male escort is no exception. On a building site, you’d have to worry about hitting your head or falling from heights. As a male escort, your main safety risks involve privacy and personal safety.
Of the clients who contact you, some will likely be scammers and you’ll have to know how to identify them. Of those that aren’t scammers, most will be perfectly safe, legitimate inquiries. That said, some may have bad intentions while others may have a poor understanding of boundaries. Stalkers are rare but it does happen.
That’s not to say these dangers can’t be mitigated. Just as builders have to wear hard hats and take out insurance policies, there are a handful of best practices that most male escorts follow to keep a lid on their privacy and stay safe on the job.
Avoiding Scam Clients
Most of the scammers you’ll encounter are of the Nigerian Prince variety. That is to say, they’ll try to hook you by offering you something that sounds too good to be true. As with all things in life, if it sounds too good to be true, that’s usually because it is.
Most scammers are opportunists. They’re looking for people who are in a hurry and won’t take the time to think through what’s happening. Many will even try pressure tactics such as suggesting that this is a limited time offer in order to apply stress and force you to make your mind up faster.
In order to avoid scammers, make sure to:
- Never give them money – money should always flow from the client to you and NOT the other way around. This includes workarounds like Amazon gift cards and cryptocurrency.
- Don’t pay for anything – expenses should always be paid by the client. Travel costs should be paid up front and you should never be out of pocket, even for a short period.
- Take a deposit – some clients may be reluctant to do this but we strongly advise escorts to take a small (10%) deposit in advance. Nine times out of ten, this all but confirms they’re not a scammer.
- Stop and think – scammers will do everything they can to stop you from questioning them until it’s too late. If you have any concerns, consider asking someone you trust. Anyone can fall for a scam but they’re usually much easier to spot from the outside looking in.
Protecting Your Privacy as an Escort
Learning how to remain private and anonymous can be a bit of a rabbit hole, especially online. There’s always more you could know and more you could be doing. That’s why it’s important to have a clear sense of goals and scope. Put simply, what are you trying to keep private and who are you keeping it from?
For most escorts, the aim is to draw a clean line between their clients and their friends/family/colleagues. On the one hand, it’s not the kind of thing you’d want your mother to come across by accident. On the other, you don’t want your clients knowing too much about you. The more they know about you, the more of a safety risk they can pose.
If you want to achieve this, then we advice the following:
- Promote yourself with a pseudonym – not all escorts do this but it is very common and it makes you a lot harder to track down via Google/social media.
- Don’t give out your main contact information – it’s best to have a dedicated email for escorting and, where possible, a second phone number is also advisable.
- Don’t give out your home address – although it may be tempting, giving out your home address is almost always a bad idea.
- Consider hiding your face in photos – most clients are understanding of this and it massively reduces the likelihood that someone will find and recognise you. It’s also best not to use the same photos you do on other social media as, even if you obscure your face, a side-by-side comparison will quickly confirm your identity. Instead, it’s best to take some unique pictures for your companionship profile.
- Separate ‘Church & State’ – when working as an escort or talking with other escorts, use a different name. Likewise, if you are going to tell anyone in your personal life (friends or family), then be sure that it’s someone you absolutely trust. If you’re not careful with who you tell, then some may attempt to exploit you with the threat of outing.
Personal Safety for Escorts
90% of personal safety for escorts is about having good screening measures before you ever meet up with your client, many of which we’ve already discussed. These measures are about confirming that they’re a real client who is interested in your services.
If in doubt, voice and video calls are a good way to confirm who they say they are.
The key is to have as watertight a process as possible that you apply to all clients. Even if you like the sound of a client and are excited to meet them, don’t bypass any of your screening steps.
For meetups, make sure to:
- Have your first meeting in a public space – this is best to do during daylight hours with lots of people around.
- Have a security buddy – have someone on hand, expecting a check-in from you to confirm your safety after the interaction is over. You don’t have to tell them exactly what you’re doing if you’d rather keep that private. You can always frame it as a blind date.
- Plan an exit – whether you’re going on holiday together or just down to the pub, make sure you know how to leave if you need to. That includes having the resources to get yourself home if things go badly.
- Discuss everything before meeting up – you should know exactly what you and the client are planning to do together. If that plan changes, then you need to know exactly why and what that means for you.